Finding my Comfort Level in a David Bellingham Postcard

A few years ago, I made a wee film with a friend that, to my surprise, Aberdeen Art Gallery selected to go on display. While I should have been pleased, I hated the whole thing. I felt like a fraud. I was taking up space that a ‘proper artist’ could have filled.

What made it worse was that my face was on show for half of the damned run time. On the opening night, I didn’t even look in its direction. It made me recoil so hard that I couldn’t take my family to see it until a year later – the last day it was on display. Safe in the knowledge that if they didn’t like it, it would be gone by the next day.

This weekend I found my work on display at The Worm on the Castlegate in Aberdeen, a brilliant little gallery run by Peacock Printmakers dedicated to contemporary print.

It was just a postcard of one of my photos for sale, showing the work of (proper artist) David Bellingham. He and Peacock asked last year if they could use it, and I’d happily agreed. I’d since forgotten, so it was a nice surprise to see I’d played a small part in his project.

I felt much more at ease with this acknowledgment – even a little proud. Especially as my youngest asked if she could buy one for her wall.

This is a level I’m comfortable with.